1 00:00:13,931 --> 00:00:16,517 Okay, I just wanted to take you through 2 00:00:16,642 --> 00:00:18,852 the main points of the sexual harassment complaint 3 00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:21,021 - from your assistant. - Right. Right. Right. 4 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:23,524 The first contention is you yanked at her clothes. 5 00:00:23,649 --> 00:00:26,109 I yanked at her-- I cleaned my glasses. 6 00:00:26,235 --> 00:00:28,070 - Cleaned your glasses. - Her shirttail was sticking out. 7 00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:30,113 I cleaned my glasses. Oh, boy. Oh, boy. 8 00:00:30,239 --> 00:00:32,533 - Send me to the cooler. - I don't want you to worry about it. 9 00:00:32,658 --> 00:00:34,243 I can handle this. 10 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:37,871 If she gets anything at all here, it would be a travesty. 11 00:00:37,996 --> 00:00:40,499 And I would, I would leave the country. 12 00:00:40,624 --> 00:00:43,001 I don't know where I'd go, but I would leave. 13 00:00:43,126 --> 00:00:45,671 I hear Canada is a good place, maybe. 14 00:00:45,796 --> 00:00:47,881 - But it's cold. - I don't recommend moving to Canada. 15 00:00:48,006 --> 00:00:50,926 What about-- what about like a Pacific island or something? 16 00:00:51,051 --> 00:00:53,887 I want to assure you that as upsetting as this is, 17 00:00:54,012 --> 00:00:56,890 I think we'll either be able to make it go away 18 00:00:57,015 --> 00:00:58,892 or come to a reasonable settlement. 19 00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:01,228 - What? Come to a what? - An amicable arrangement-- 20 00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:03,981 A settlement? A reasonable settlement? 21 00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:07,150 "Millions for defense. Not one cent for tribute." 22 00:01:07,276 --> 00:01:10,153 That's what we said when the British were impressing our seamen. 23 00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:12,614 You, you know they tried to impress our seamen, right? 24 00:01:12,739 --> 00:01:15,534 They'd be on the ship, they'd yell across at one of our ships. 25 00:01:15,659 --> 00:01:19,871 "Hey, there! We have the best dental plan in all of Europe. 26 00:01:19,997 --> 00:01:23,917 "Why, look at our bicorn hats and fancy brass buttons. 27 00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:27,296 How's that, sailors? Are you impressed by that?" 28 00:01:27,421 --> 00:01:29,131 Anything else we haven't gone over? 29 00:01:29,256 --> 00:01:31,340 - Hmm. - Okay. 30 00:01:31,465 --> 00:01:34,136 If anything comes to you after this conversation... 31 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:36,597 - You'll be the first to know. - ...you're in your car, you're driving home... 32 00:01:36,722 --> 00:01:37,764 - Yeah. - ...pick up the phone. 33 00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:39,349 - Really? - Yeah. 34 00:01:39,474 --> 00:01:42,019 If I do happen to call you, which I very well could, 35 00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:45,772 does that mean that I'll be charged for the time? 36 00:01:45,897 --> 00:01:49,860 In this office, we, uh, we try to use a holistic approach 37 00:01:49,985 --> 00:01:51,778 - to compensation. - Mm. 38 00:01:51,903 --> 00:01:53,614 We want our clients not to be inhibited 39 00:01:53,739 --> 00:01:56,116 in their use of our services. 40 00:01:56,241 --> 00:01:57,826 So you charge me. 41 00:01:57,951 --> 00:01:59,328 Yeah. 42 00:01:59,453 --> 00:02:01,955 Uh, all right, I think that takes care of it. 43 00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:04,207 - May I use your bathroom? - Yeah, the bathroom's, uh, 44 00:02:04,333 --> 00:02:06,335 just to your right, down the hall. 45 00:02:06,460 --> 00:02:08,377 Right there at reception where you came in, there's a little jog in the hallway. 46 00:02:08,502 --> 00:02:12,341 Yeah. No. I already saw that, but I'm here, and, you know, it's... 47 00:02:12,466 --> 00:02:15,969 an infinitely better bathroom than to send me to a public-- -Oh, it's nothing special. 48 00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:18,388 You'll be much happier down the hall. We just redid 'em. They're great. 49 00:02:18,513 --> 00:02:20,389 I'll leave it exactly the way I found it. 50 00:02:20,514 --> 00:02:22,601 I'm like a murderer going in there. 51 00:02:22,726 --> 00:02:26,813 I completely expunge all evidence that I was ever there. 52 00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:29,524 Motion denied, as they say in the profession. 53 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:34,863 Where is it? 54 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:37,407 [Roger] Down the hall and to the right. 55 00:02:38,532 --> 00:02:39,743 Hi. 56 00:02:39,868 --> 00:02:43,080 - Mr. David. - Validation, please. 57 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:48,960 Is that a problem? 58 00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:50,879 Well, I mean, to be perfectly honest, 59 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:53,173 do you really think that you need it? 60 00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:55,217 It's not about the money, okay? 61 00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:58,553 It's about having to go into your pants pocket, 62 00:02:58,679 --> 00:03:00,597 in a car when you're paying. 63 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:03,600 Have you ever been in a car trying to get to your pocket? 64 00:03:03,725 --> 00:03:06,645 - It does seem like a great deal of effort. - Yes. 65 00:03:06,770 --> 00:03:08,897 This is why homeless people don't make a lot of money 66 00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:11,983 from people in cars, 'cause nobody wants to go into their pockets. 67 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,528 There you are, Mr. David. You have a lovely day. 68 00:03:14,653 --> 00:03:17,072 Yeah. Uh, you know what? 69 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:19,032 This is only for an hour. 70 00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:21,993 I was here for at least an hour-ten. 71 00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:25,580 Sure thing. 72 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,499 Here, Mr. David. You have a good day. 73 00:03:27,624 --> 00:03:30,210 Hope to see you again. I intend to be in this building a lot. 74 00:03:30,335 --> 00:03:32,379 That's fantastic. 75 00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:41,888 Hello? 76 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:44,141 Larry, uh, this is Dr. Bahn. 77 00:03:44,266 --> 00:03:48,562 - Yeah? - I'm not liking some of the numbers I'm seeing 78 00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:51,523 and would like to test you for thyroid cancer. 79 00:03:53,150 --> 00:03:54,943 I would like to get an MRI 80 00:03:55,068 --> 00:03:56,361 just to be safe. 81 00:03:56,486 --> 00:03:58,405 Is there a mass? 82 00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:00,073 Yes. There is a mass. 83 00:04:00,198 --> 00:04:03,618 Has it... spread? 84 00:04:03,744 --> 00:04:05,120 Well, that we don't know, and that's why 85 00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,289 I'd like to get you in for some tests today. 86 00:04:07,414 --> 00:04:09,750 - What are my odds? - [Dr. Bahn] Uh, Larry, it's way too early 87 00:04:09,875 --> 00:04:11,376 to be thinking that way. 88 00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,128 Just contact my office, and, uh, 89 00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,380 we should get the results in two days. 90 00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:36,109 - [Andy] And a two of hearts. - [Richard] Ooh, lucky you. 91 00:04:36,234 --> 00:04:37,319 Possible flush, no straight. 92 00:04:37,444 --> 00:04:38,570 - Go ahead, Leon. You got the bet. - Woo! 93 00:04:38,695 --> 00:04:40,113 - You got the bet. - See what I got. 94 00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:41,656 - [Larry] Come on, spend some money. - Bam! 95 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:42,824 - Nope. - [Andy] Swat? 96 00:04:42,949 --> 00:04:44,659 - Richard? - Two. 97 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:46,036 Ooh. 98 00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:47,954 All right, I'm in. 99 00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:50,373 Why weren't you at the fundraiser the other night? 100 00:04:50,499 --> 00:04:53,335 - For the prison art collectors? - What, what, what fundraiser? 101 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:54,920 For the prisoners who draw art. 102 00:04:55,045 --> 00:04:57,214 I sent you the invitation. Why weren't you there? 103 00:04:57,339 --> 00:04:58,714 - I never got the invite. - We sent it. 104 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:01,176 Never got it. Must have got lost in the mail. 105 00:05:01,301 --> 00:05:03,678 Aah boy. I don't trust the mail anymore. I swear I don't. 106 00:05:03,803 --> 00:05:05,555 That stinks. I would have gone to that. 107 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,098 - You would have enjoyed it. - [Leon] Wow. 108 00:05:07,224 --> 00:05:09,559 [Andy] All right, next card is a ten of spades. 109 00:05:09,684 --> 00:05:11,812 - I'm out. I fold. - [Andy] Okay, he's out. Go ahead. 110 00:05:11,937 --> 00:05:13,230 [Andy] You're out. You check. 111 00:05:13,355 --> 00:05:14,606 - [Richard] I fold. - Fold. 112 00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:15,857 - Really? - I just wanna give you-- Yeah. 113 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,108 I wanna give you a heads up. 114 00:05:17,234 --> 00:05:18,819 Susie's birthday is in about a week. 115 00:05:18,944 --> 00:05:20,195 Why are you giving me a heads up? 116 00:05:20,320 --> 00:05:23,031 Uh, she told me to tell you. 117 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:25,909 - Get the hell out of here. She told you to tell me? - [Jeff] Yeah. Yeah. 118 00:05:26,034 --> 00:05:27,536 As a matter of fact, she wants a camera. 119 00:05:27,661 --> 00:05:29,913 She's shameless, this woman. She's shameless. 120 00:05:30,038 --> 00:05:31,289 - It's unbelievable. - Wow. 121 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:33,333 You don't get to pick your gift, okay? 122 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:35,710 - I'm not a Sears catalog. - Just lettin' you know. Just lettin' you know. 123 00:05:35,836 --> 00:05:38,421 Anyway, I already got her something. It's gonna be a nice surprise. 124 00:05:38,547 --> 00:05:39,923 - Really? - [Larry] Yeah. 125 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,383 All right, nine is the last card. 126 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:42,926 You got the bet. 127 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:45,011 Go ahead. You guys are out. Go ahead. 128 00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:47,138 I just want you to know before you bet, I have a pair of aces. 129 00:05:47,264 --> 00:05:49,850 Okay. Twenty bucks, aces. 130 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,186 I have a pair of aces. I call. What do you have? 131 00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:57,858 [Larry] Okay. I got three nines. 132 00:05:57,983 --> 00:05:59,943 - Ooh! Shit! - [Andy] That's unbelievable. 133 00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:00,944 - Huh? - [Leon] Ate your ass for dinner. 134 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:02,404 On the river, you get a nine. 135 00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:03,654 [Richard] Cincinnati Kid. 136 00:06:03,779 --> 00:06:05,407 You are the luckiest guy around. 137 00:06:05,532 --> 00:06:07,325 - Honest to God. - Yeah, yeah, luckiest guy around. 138 00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:09,870 I went to the doctor this week, and, I, uh... 139 00:06:10,537 --> 00:06:12,247 She found something, and... 140 00:06:12,372 --> 00:06:15,500 - She's testing for, you know, cancer, so... - [Jeff] Wow. 141 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,460 - I'll find out in a few days. - Really? 142 00:06:17,586 --> 00:06:19,504 - Yeah. I'm sure it's nothing, you know. - [Jeff] You're kidding me. 143 00:06:19,629 --> 00:06:20,797 [Leon] Shit, Larry. God damn. 144 00:06:20,922 --> 00:06:22,257 You're up. 145 00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,593 Well, I just want to let you know, 146 00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,802 lettin' you know, 147 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:28,178 - if you do have cancer... - Mm. 148 00:06:28,305 --> 00:06:29,639 ...I can't be your friend anymore. 149 00:06:29,764 --> 00:06:32,183 I-I'm not a cancer friend. I can't do the cancer friend. 150 00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:34,185 - That's not me. It's too much. Too much. - Mm. Yeah. 151 00:06:34,311 --> 00:06:36,438 You know, I gotta agree with Jeff. 152 00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:40,025 If you get cancer, I'll never speak to you again. 153 00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:41,776 - [Andy] Wow. - I get that. Yeah. 154 00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:43,987 When I found out my daddy had cancer, 155 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,906 I never spoke to that man again. 156 00:06:46,031 --> 00:06:48,074 - I even stopped taking his calls. - Wow. Really? 157 00:06:48,199 --> 00:06:49,367 - [Swat] Yep. - Did he die? 158 00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:51,286 I don't know. 159 00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:52,454 - Mm. - Whoa. 160 00:06:52,579 --> 00:06:54,289 [Leon] That's fuckin' deep, man. 161 00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:56,374 All right I'll tell you what. I have a proposal. 162 00:06:56,499 --> 00:06:58,668 Let's make a little deal here, okay? 163 00:06:58,793 --> 00:07:01,463 A no-cancer friend reciprocity pact. 164 00:07:01,588 --> 00:07:03,882 If anyone gets it, we all stop being friends with you, 165 00:07:04,007 --> 00:07:05,216 and vice versa. 166 00:07:05,342 --> 00:07:07,385 - There you go! - Very gracious of you! 167 00:07:09,303 --> 00:07:11,431 Don't fuck up. Don't fuck with me, I won't fuck with you. 168 00:07:11,556 --> 00:07:13,475 - [Larry] All right. - Leon, your deal. Come on, let's play poker. 169 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:14,976 - [Leon] Let's go, baby. - [Jeff] Okay. 170 00:07:21,274 --> 00:07:23,193 Sorry I'm late. 171 00:07:23,318 --> 00:07:25,528 - It's okay. - You know what? 172 00:07:25,654 --> 00:07:27,822 I detest every single person in a car. 173 00:07:27,948 --> 00:07:30,158 - There are a lot of stupid drivers, yeah. - Yeah. 174 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:31,993 How are you feeling? 175 00:07:32,118 --> 00:07:33,495 I'm better. 176 00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:35,705 - I'm a lot better. - I'm really sorry about 177 00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:37,666 that talc incident. 178 00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:39,584 I say next time, just... 179 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,045 do the shower, yeah. 180 00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:44,923 {\an8}Yeah. Oh, geez, look at, look at this thing. 181 00:07:45,048 --> 00:07:46,466 {\an8}- Huh? - Yeah, I know, it's-- 182 00:07:46,591 --> 00:07:49,052 {\an8}Jesus, look, look, what-- I, I don't understand it. 183 00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:50,637 - Another wobbly table. - I know. 184 00:07:50,762 --> 00:07:52,597 They're all over. It's an epidemic. 185 00:07:52,722 --> 00:07:55,684 I'm gonna end the wobbly table epidemic, in my coffee house. 186 00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:58,645 - Mm. - Ours are gonna be cemented in... 187 00:07:58,770 --> 00:08:00,563 - They're gonna be cemented in the ground. - Mm-hmm. 188 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:02,816 Ah. You know what? I think I'll do a little, uh, 189 00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:04,859 a little side-sitting. 190 00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:07,612 - A side-sit? - Yeah. A side-sit. 191 00:08:07,737 --> 00:08:09,447 I don't think that's a good idea. 192 00:08:09,572 --> 00:08:12,617 - Why? What's the big deal? - Well, it's, uh, very intimate. 193 00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:15,704 I-- This is too far to talk to somebody. 194 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:17,539 It feels a little close. 195 00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:19,749 - I don't think so. - Okay. 196 00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:21,042 Oh. 197 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:22,335 - There you go. - Thank you. 198 00:08:22,460 --> 00:08:26,089 [Larry] It's my mailman. His name's Lionel. 199 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:27,215 Hey. 200 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,217 - [Cheryl] Lionel? - [Larry] Yeah. 201 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,011 - Take care. Have a good day. - Thank you. You too. 202 00:08:31,136 --> 00:08:34,431 Yeah. Something about that guy gives me the creeps. 203 00:08:34,556 --> 00:08:36,641 - Yeah. - Um... 204 00:08:36,766 --> 00:08:41,312 - How are you doing? - Good. Can I introduce you to my friend, the elephant? 205 00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:43,606 Huh? He's a big boy. 206 00:08:43,732 --> 00:08:46,568 - Keeps growing. - Yes, yes. 207 00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:49,154 I mean, how do you feel about it? 208 00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:52,615 Well, I feel the same as I've always felt. 209 00:08:52,741 --> 00:08:55,368 I think we should... I think we should be together. 210 00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,621 Yeah, I don't... 211 00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:00,832 I don't think that's a good idea. 212 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:04,669 I think we need to... 213 00:09:05,587 --> 00:09:08,048 end it, call it off. 214 00:09:08,173 --> 00:09:10,467 I think we should be apart. 215 00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,054 You know, I... 216 00:09:15,179 --> 00:09:16,639 I was at the doctor, 217 00:09:16,765 --> 00:09:18,725 and I'm waiting to get some... 218 00:09:19,350 --> 00:09:20,852 test results back. 219 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,937 Oh. What kind of tests? 220 00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:25,398 Could be... 221 00:09:26,024 --> 00:09:27,400 cancer? 222 00:09:27,525 --> 00:09:29,527 It's just a test, right? 223 00:09:29,652 --> 00:09:30,487 - Yeah. - Yeah. 224 00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:31,821 It's a test, but... 225 00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:33,698 - it's a test for cancer. - Right. 226 00:09:33,823 --> 00:09:35,784 I mean, a lot of people get tested. 227 00:09:35,909 --> 00:09:37,785 Not for cancer. 228 00:09:37,910 --> 00:09:39,828 - Yeah, a lot of people get tested for cancer. - No, this is cancer. 229 00:09:39,953 --> 00:09:41,831 - It's a cancer test. - I know a lot of people-- 230 00:09:41,956 --> 00:09:43,708 No, this is cancer. 231 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:46,419 - Um... - Serious, serious test. 232 00:09:47,003 --> 00:09:49,214 - Could you excuse us for a sec? - Sure. 233 00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:52,133 Well, I hope your tests come back negative, 234 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:54,469 but we're not gonna get back together. 235 00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:59,432 Hypothetically, suppose she told me I had... 236 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,226 two years. 237 00:10:01,351 --> 00:10:03,895 Would that alter your thinking about us at all? 238 00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:08,232 - You mean, get together for two years until you died? - Yeah. Yeah. 239 00:10:08,357 --> 00:10:09,984 I think you'd have a pretty good time. 240 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,153 - Do you? Yeah. - Yeah I'd be complaining a little bit. 241 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,197 But I can get a nurse and complain to the nurse 242 00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:16,282 and leave you out of that part. 243 00:10:16,407 --> 00:10:19,744 Well, let's see what the tests... say. 244 00:10:20,370 --> 00:10:22,330 You know, we could do a lot of traveling. 245 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:23,832 You don't like to travel. 246 00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,958 Would you mind if I brought the nurse along? 247 00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:29,003 Okay. I think we're good the way we are. 248 00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:32,881 Yeah. 249 00:10:35,927 --> 00:10:37,971 All right. 250 00:10:39,681 --> 00:10:42,392 - What are you gonna get? - I don't give a fuck. 251 00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:45,352 [Milos] Okay, Mr. Greene. 252 00:10:45,477 --> 00:10:48,439 Almost finished. Just need to pick up two-- -Larry: Hey, Milos! 253 00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:50,525 How ya doing? 254 00:10:50,650 --> 00:10:53,486 - Good. How are you? - Good. You coming over to the coffee store later? 255 00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:56,280 - Of course. I'll be there. I got to finish up. See you. - [Larry] Beautiful. Thank you. 256 00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:59,784 - Milos, he's gonna be doing some work in the coffee place. - Yeah, he's fantastic. 257 00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,369 Wh-what's that? 258 00:11:01,494 --> 00:11:03,163 It's a little somethin' for your wife. 259 00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:05,498 A birthday present. Huh? 260 00:11:06,291 --> 00:11:08,001 So how'd it go with Cheryl? 261 00:11:08,543 --> 00:11:10,086 Not gonna happen. 262 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:11,713 - No! - Yeah. 263 00:11:11,838 --> 00:11:14,174 - I'm sorry, man. - Well, you know, it's a long shot, anyway. 264 00:11:14,299 --> 00:11:16,801 - Did you think it would happen? - No, I knew it was a long shot, 265 00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,636 but what are, you know, what are you gonna do? 266 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:21,973 I'll tell you what you do. You're gonna get back out there. 267 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:23,725 You can't date now. You can't-- 268 00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:25,643 How do you even make a move in this climate? 269 00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:30,064 Plus, I got that sexual harassment thing from the, uh, assistant. 270 00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:32,734 And I'm old and bald. 271 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,027 - Old and bald. - Yeah. 272 00:11:34,152 --> 00:11:35,904 - That means nothing. - Please. Are you kidding? 273 00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:39,324 - You're rich! - You think rich beats old and bald? 274 00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:42,994 You could have mutton chops and wear a, a cartoon tie 275 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,121 of, uh, Felix the Cat. 276 00:11:45,246 --> 00:11:46,664 Some old-timey cartoon. 277 00:11:46,789 --> 00:11:48,875 You can, you can paint them blue, 278 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,753 and wear an Abe Lincoln hat. You'll be fine. 279 00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:53,004 - Really? - Trust me. Yeah. 280 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:55,173 Okay. I'm gonna get back out there. 281 00:11:55,298 --> 00:11:56,549 I gotta ask you something. 282 00:11:56,674 --> 00:11:58,426 The other night at poker, 283 00:11:58,551 --> 00:12:00,553 that invitation, it, it didn't get lost. 284 00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:02,639 - No, of course not. - You made that whole thing up. 285 00:12:02,764 --> 00:12:05,141 - Yeah. Totally made it up. - Oh, you're good. 286 00:12:05,266 --> 00:12:06,476 Blame it on the mailman. 287 00:12:06,601 --> 00:12:08,186 - Blame it on the mailman. - Yeah. 288 00:12:08,311 --> 00:12:10,230 - [Susie] Jeffrey! - Oh... 289 00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:11,773 - Oh, hi, Lar. - Oh, hello. 290 00:12:11,898 --> 00:12:13,942 - I didn't know you were here. - [Larry] I am here. 291 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:16,361 - Yeah? What? - Stand right there. 292 00:12:16,486 --> 00:12:18,071 - [Susie] Okay. - Don't move. 293 00:12:18,196 --> 00:12:19,530 What? What? What? 294 00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:22,867 - What is that? - What is it? It's for you! 295 00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:25,912 - For your birthday! - You've never gotten me a birthday gift. 296 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:27,288 I did this year! 297 00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:28,957 Yeah, what is it? What is it? 298 00:12:30,291 --> 00:12:32,669 [Susie] Oh, my God. Larry! 299 00:12:32,794 --> 00:12:34,921 - Oh, my God! - Huh? You love it? 300 00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:36,589 [Larry] I had it commissioned. A great artist. 301 00:12:36,714 --> 00:12:38,216 Gave me a big discount. 302 00:12:38,341 --> 00:12:40,510 - You had this made for me? - Yeah. 303 00:12:40,635 --> 00:12:43,972 - From you, of all people, 'cause you're not a giver. - No. 304 00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:46,557 [Susie] Oh, my God. 305 00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:49,602 It's absolutely magnificent. 306 00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:52,563 It's magnificent. It's a work of art. 307 00:12:52,689 --> 00:12:54,399 It's not just 'cause it's me. 308 00:12:54,524 --> 00:12:56,401 All is forgiven. 309 00:12:56,526 --> 00:12:57,986 Everything you've ever done, 310 00:12:58,111 --> 00:12:59,320 every horrible thing 311 00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:00,697 you've done to me is forgiven for this. 312 00:13:00,822 --> 00:13:02,907 What are you talking about? What have I done? 313 00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:04,742 - Oh, my God. Jeff, what... - What are you forgiving? 314 00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:07,953 Oh, wait a minute. I gotta go talk to this fuckin' Milos. 315 00:13:08,078 --> 00:13:11,916 Screwing up my deck. Hey, Milos! Milos! 316 00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:13,376 What were you thinking? 317 00:13:13,501 --> 00:13:15,878 I thought I told you a camera, a fucking camera. 318 00:13:16,004 --> 00:13:18,047 - [Susie] This is mahogany cream. - You fucked me. 319 00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,425 - [Larry] What? - [Susie] It's shit. Do you understand what I'm saying? 320 00:13:20,550 --> 00:13:23,553 - [Milo] I wrote it down. Mahogany cream. - Yes! This is mahogany cream! 321 00:13:23,678 --> 00:13:26,222 - This is not mahogany cream! - This is mahogany cream. 322 00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,891 I'm not paying for this piece of shit crap! 323 00:13:29,017 --> 00:13:31,811 You redo it, or you don't get paid. 324 00:13:31,936 --> 00:13:33,688 It's bullshit! 325 00:13:35,898 --> 00:13:38,776 - That poor bastard never had a chance. - No. 326 00:13:46,576 --> 00:13:48,453 - Mr. David? - Yeah? 327 00:13:48,578 --> 00:13:50,538 I've heard that you're going around telling people 328 00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,623 that I've lost their invitations? 329 00:13:52,749 --> 00:13:54,292 Wh-where'd you get that from? 330 00:13:54,417 --> 00:13:56,085 Andy and Cassie David told me. 331 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,087 Can I tell you a little story? 332 00:13:58,212 --> 00:13:59,881 I got invited to some kind of fundraiser, 333 00:14:00,006 --> 00:14:02,967 prison art something. I-- you know, I'm not gonna... 334 00:14:03,468 --> 00:14:05,886 I'm not gonna do that. So I said... 335 00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:09,807 I never got the invitation. It got lost in the mail. 336 00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,143 - Lost in the mail. - Yeah. 337 00:14:12,268 --> 00:14:14,062 So, I'm the mail. 338 00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:16,606 Yes. In this particular case-- -I'm the guy that is delivering the mail, 339 00:14:16,731 --> 00:14:18,775 so that is a stain on an otherwise perfect record. 340 00:14:18,900 --> 00:14:20,568 I've never lost a piece of mail. 341 00:14:21,361 --> 00:14:24,989 - Come on. All right. - Listen, I just need you to please... 342 00:14:25,114 --> 00:14:27,075 go tell Andy and Cassie the truth about this. 343 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:29,911 I'll consider it. Look, can I give you a little tip? 344 00:14:30,036 --> 00:14:31,496 If you're gonna confront somebody 345 00:14:31,621 --> 00:14:33,414 and ask them to do something like this, 346 00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:36,084 it's better to do it with pants on. 347 00:14:36,209 --> 00:14:37,251 The shorts... 348 00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:39,587 {\an8}This is the required uniform for a postman. 349 00:14:40,505 --> 00:14:41,923 - Really? - Yeah. 350 00:14:42,048 --> 00:14:43,216 And the socks, too? 351 00:14:43,341 --> 00:14:45,301 - That's part of it? The black socks? - Right. 352 00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:47,929 Yes. Post Office issued socks. Yes. 353 00:14:48,054 --> 00:14:49,055 They issue socks? 354 00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,890 - Yeah. - How many pairs? 355 00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:52,475 What does that have to do with this? 356 00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,268 I'm just curious how often you have to wash those socks. 357 00:14:54,394 --> 00:14:56,813 They give you five or six pairs, and you rotate them. Okay? 358 00:14:56,938 --> 00:14:58,856 - How many pairs of shorts do they give you? - Listen. 359 00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:00,691 If you don't want to go to something, don't go, 360 00:15:00,817 --> 00:15:02,985 but don't hide behind the US Postal Service. 361 00:15:03,111 --> 00:15:05,363 It's hard to take a person seriously wearing shorts. 362 00:15:05,488 --> 00:15:07,615 I'm at work, doing work. This is my work uniform. 363 00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,867 - I'm confronting you. - I'm giving you, I'm giving you-- 364 00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,536 - Excuse me one second. I was giving you a good tip. 365 00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:13,204 - Good advice. - Take the call. 366 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,956 - I'm givin' you good advice. - Just take the call. 367 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,499 Hello? 368 00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:18,084 - Larry David? - Larry Yes? 369 00:15:18,209 --> 00:15:19,502 It's Dr. Bahn. 370 00:15:19,627 --> 00:15:21,045 The test results came back. 371 00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:23,214 Aah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 372 00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:25,550 Dr. Bahn As you know, we did a fine-needle biopsy, 373 00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,343 - on the mass. - Oh, my God. This is bad. 374 00:15:27,468 --> 00:15:29,762 - [Dr. Bahn] And an MRI. - It's bad. It's bad. What? 375 00:15:29,887 --> 00:15:32,723 It's just a benign cyst, not cancerous. 376 00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:35,852 - You're clean as a whistle. - Ah! Ha-ha! 377 00:15:35,977 --> 00:15:38,104 Ah! Ha-ha-ha-ha! 378 00:15:38,229 --> 00:15:40,815 - Oh, thank you. Thank you! - [Dr. Bahn] You're welcome. 379 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:43,734 Ah! Negative! Negative! 380 00:15:44,318 --> 00:15:46,237 - Ah! - Just... okay? 381 00:15:46,362 --> 00:15:48,489 - Fine. The matter at hand-- - I'll I'll talk to 'em. 382 00:15:48,614 --> 00:15:50,616 - Please tell Andy and Cassie... - I'll talk to 'em. I'll talk to 'em. 383 00:15:50,741 --> 00:15:52,577 Yes. 384 00:15:52,702 --> 00:15:55,163 [Rita] Mr. Swindell will be here in five minutes. 385 00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:57,039 - Make yourself comfortable. - Okay. 386 00:15:57,165 --> 00:15:58,166 All right. 387 00:16:43,503 --> 00:16:45,630 - Okay. Hey, Larry. - [Larry] Oh, hey! 388 00:16:45,755 --> 00:16:48,382 - Sorry to keep you waiting. - Oh, no, no. Don't be silly. 389 00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:49,800 All's good? You've been well? 390 00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:53,638 Funny you should mention it, 'cause I had a bit of a scare 391 00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:56,682 at the doctor, I just got the results back, 392 00:16:56,807 --> 00:16:59,227 and, uh... I'm good. 393 00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:01,187 Oh, that's great. You must be relieved. 394 00:17:01,312 --> 00:17:04,398 Well, I'm relieved, except it's been two days since I found out, 395 00:17:04,523 --> 00:17:08,027 and not one of my friends has inquired 396 00:17:08,152 --> 00:17:10,571 as to how the test turned out, not one. 397 00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:13,366 - I see. - I'm gonna dump the whole bunch of 'em. 398 00:17:13,491 --> 00:17:15,952 - I'll get myself some new friends. - That's great news. 399 00:17:16,077 --> 00:17:19,622 - Maybe, uh, maybe we could strike up a friendship. - I'm relieved for you. 400 00:17:20,665 --> 00:17:23,042 I, I have a busy life, and, uh... 401 00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:25,169 but, uh, I am, I am really relieved 402 00:17:25,294 --> 00:17:27,004 - that you got the news that you got. - Mm thank you. 403 00:17:27,129 --> 00:17:29,257 And I have some other good news for you, too. 404 00:17:29,382 --> 00:17:32,093 Which is that Ms. Huff's team gave me a call, 405 00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,887 and she would like to meet with you. 406 00:17:35,012 --> 00:17:36,513 Face-to-face, 407 00:17:36,638 --> 00:17:38,432 just the two of you alone in a public place, of course. 408 00:17:38,558 --> 00:17:39,850 Alice wants to meet? 409 00:17:39,976 --> 00:17:41,561 The fact that she is reaching out is great. 410 00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:44,272 That's fantastic. Maybe she's come to her senses. 411 00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,315 If you just give her the chance to air 412 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,568 whatever she wants to air, listen to her, and maybe... 413 00:17:48,693 --> 00:17:50,570 Yeah, sure, yeah. I'll listen. I'll-- we'll air. Yeah, listen and air. 414 00:17:50,695 --> 00:17:52,905 [Roger] Then the whole thing could go away. 415 00:17:53,030 --> 00:17:55,157 - That's good news. Look at you. The bearer of good tidings. - Uh, sorry. 416 00:17:55,282 --> 00:17:57,994 Hold on one second. Just to get a tissue. 417 00:18:08,045 --> 00:18:09,630 What's up? 418 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:17,096 Problem? 419 00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:18,681 Did you use my bathroom? 420 00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:20,349 What? No. Absolutely not. 421 00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:22,518 Why would I use your bathroom? You told me not to. 422 00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:24,311 I mean, you did ask to use it. 423 00:18:24,436 --> 00:18:27,273 Yes, I did, but you were quite emphatic about it. 424 00:18:27,398 --> 00:18:29,483 And, uh, you know, well, what am I gonna do? 425 00:18:29,609 --> 00:18:32,903 - That's, that's the rule. - Your interest was not casual. 426 00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,739 I'm telling you the truth. 427 00:18:41,746 --> 00:18:44,248 - It's your old pal. - Mr. David. 428 00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:48,461 Beautiful view here. How long did it take you to take it for granted? 429 00:18:48,586 --> 00:18:50,880 Um... not long, I guess. 430 00:18:51,005 --> 00:18:52,757 It would take me about a day, maybe less, 431 00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:54,258 maybe a half an hour. 432 00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:56,302 And I would never look out the window again 433 00:18:56,427 --> 00:18:58,471 and go, "Ooh, look at that view." 434 00:18:58,596 --> 00:19:01,474 Anyway, here for some validation. 435 00:19:01,599 --> 00:19:02,975 Can I ask you something? 436 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:05,811 Swindell-- have you ever used his bathroom? 437 00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:09,231 - I have. - What? 438 00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:12,484 Why fly public when you can fly private, am I right? 439 00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:14,570 I mean, the public toilets, forget it. 440 00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:15,988 - Don't get me started. - You can't do it. 441 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:17,907 Have you been in a woman's restroom? 442 00:19:18,032 --> 00:19:19,950 Do you know how vile women can be? 443 00:19:20,076 --> 00:19:23,244 Women? Oh, that's nothing compared to a men's room, nothing. 444 00:19:23,371 --> 00:19:24,997 You guys get to stand up. We have to sit down. 445 00:19:25,122 --> 00:19:27,583 Hey, you know what? I'll take you out for a night on the town. 446 00:19:27,708 --> 00:19:29,292 We'll go toilet-hopping. 447 00:19:29,417 --> 00:19:31,462 We'll, we'll look at men's rooms and ladies' rooms, 448 00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:33,422 and we'll make a little comparison. Would you like to do that? 449 00:19:33,547 --> 00:19:36,300 - As in a date? - Yes, yes, a date. 450 00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:39,553 I know this is something you've probably been dreaming about most of your life. 451 00:19:39,679 --> 00:19:42,598 "Oh, dear God, please let me meet an old bald man, 452 00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:44,433 "who will take me toilet-hopping, 453 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:47,269 "from toilet to toilet, throughout the town. 454 00:19:47,395 --> 00:19:50,356 Please, God. Please make that happen." 455 00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:52,692 I'm game. 456 00:19:53,526 --> 00:19:56,237 I, I, I don't even know what to say. I'm shocked. 457 00:19:56,362 --> 00:19:59,031 - Validation? - Yes. And your name is? 458 00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:00,574 My name is Rita. 459 00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,827 Rita. You'll be hearing from me. 460 00:20:02,952 --> 00:20:05,121 You lucky gal! 461 00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:12,420 What? What? 462 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:14,422 Larry? 463 00:20:15,005 --> 00:20:16,799 - Hey. - What's in there? 464 00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:20,469 Oh, it's a, uh... coffee place. 465 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,763 I'm opening up a spite store to take him out of business. 466 00:20:23,263 --> 00:20:25,850 I don't know what a spite store is, and I don't really care. 467 00:20:25,975 --> 00:20:29,478 - I want to talk to you about something. - Sure. 468 00:20:29,603 --> 00:20:32,064 Somebody told me you were side-sitting Cheryl. 469 00:20:32,189 --> 00:20:35,693 - Who told you that? - The mailman. He said he was in a restaurant 470 00:20:35,818 --> 00:20:37,403 and saw you side-sitting. 471 00:20:37,528 --> 00:20:39,571 You're making too much about a side-sit. 472 00:20:39,696 --> 00:20:41,323 I side-sit with everybody. 473 00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:43,117 I side-sit with my doctor, I side-sit with my therapist. 474 00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:44,827 I've never seen you side-sit anybody. 475 00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:48,372 If you ever see me sitting, you'll see me side-sitting. 476 00:20:55,713 --> 00:20:57,089 Hello? 477 00:20:57,214 --> 00:20:59,675 What were you thinkin' gettin' Susie that painting? 478 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:01,969 Aah, I'm-I'm so sorry. 479 00:21:02,094 --> 00:21:04,096 It stares at me! It's just there! 480 00:21:04,221 --> 00:21:06,849 I go for a snack, it's staring at me! 481 00:21:06,974 --> 00:21:08,893 I wish there was somethin' I could do. 482 00:21:09,018 --> 00:21:10,144 Well, I told you to get her a camera! 483 00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:11,936 Why couldn't you get her a camera?! 484 00:21:12,061 --> 00:21:13,731 I should have given her the camera. 485 00:21:13,856 --> 00:21:15,316 [Jeff over phone] Next time get her a camera! 486 00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:16,859 Believe me, there won't be a next time! 487 00:21:16,984 --> 00:21:18,694 Good! Don't get her anything again! 488 00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:20,988 I will never give anyone a gift again. What do you think about that? 489 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:22,990 [Jeff] I think it's the best idea you've had all day! 490 00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:24,532 - I'm done with presents! - My birthday's coming up in a month! 491 00:21:24,657 --> 00:21:26,118 - What are you gettin' me?! - Nothin'! 492 00:21:26,243 --> 00:21:27,994 - [Jeff] Ha! Thank you! - You're welcome! 493 00:21:28,119 --> 00:21:28,954 Aah! 494 00:21:33,042 --> 00:21:36,295 - [Larry] I like what you did with this apartment. - [Rita] Thank you. 495 00:21:38,047 --> 00:21:40,382 - [Larry] You play the piano? - [Rita] I don't. No. 496 00:21:40,508 --> 00:21:42,176 I borrowed it. 497 00:21:43,385 --> 00:21:45,805 You don't play, and you borrowed a piano? 498 00:21:45,930 --> 00:21:47,598 It was a joke. I didn't borrow the piano. 499 00:21:48,057 --> 00:21:50,184 Well, that's quite a, uh... 500 00:21:50,309 --> 00:21:52,353 That's quite an attempt at a joke. 501 00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:54,271 Thank you. You could use it. 502 00:21:54,396 --> 00:21:55,731 That's okay. 503 00:21:56,398 --> 00:22:00,653 All right, well, we've come to that juncture in the evening where... 504 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:05,449 a move of some kind is either... 505 00:22:06,325 --> 00:22:10,287 required or, uh... expected. 506 00:22:10,412 --> 00:22:11,747 I agree. 507 00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:13,499 - You agree? - I do. 508 00:22:13,624 --> 00:22:15,667 - That's good. That's good. Now... - That's good. 509 00:22:15,792 --> 00:22:17,378 ...given the current climate, 510 00:22:17,503 --> 00:22:20,381 I would like to ask you a series of questions 511 00:22:20,506 --> 00:22:23,509 to determine how comfortable you are 512 00:22:23,634 --> 00:22:26,428 with physical contact as it progresses. 513 00:22:26,554 --> 00:22:28,013 All right. That sounds fair. 514 00:22:28,138 --> 00:22:32,226 I'd like to begin by taking my right hand 515 00:22:32,351 --> 00:22:34,395 and place it on your right shoulder. 516 00:22:35,020 --> 00:22:37,690 - Would that be acceptable? - That is acceptable. Yes. 517 00:22:37,815 --> 00:22:39,775 - Ah. Okay. - Okay. 518 00:22:42,319 --> 00:22:45,489 - Now I'd like to take this left hand of mine... - Yes. 519 00:22:45,614 --> 00:22:47,992 ...and place it under your rib cage, 520 00:22:48,117 --> 00:22:49,702 fairly close to the right breast, 521 00:22:49,827 --> 00:22:51,412 but keeping a safe distance. 522 00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:52,997 That is acceptable. 523 00:22:54,707 --> 00:22:56,417 - There we go. - That's very nice. 524 00:22:56,542 --> 00:22:59,044 Ah! By the way, throughout this process, 525 00:22:59,169 --> 00:23:01,297 I would encourage any feedback. 526 00:23:01,422 --> 00:23:04,592 - Well, and I would expect the same from you. - Oh. 527 00:23:05,092 --> 00:23:09,305 How would you feel about a little grazing of the lips? 528 00:23:09,430 --> 00:23:11,181 I think I would feel very good about that. 529 00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:13,976 Well, then a grazing you shall have. 530 00:23:16,729 --> 00:23:18,105 Aha. 531 00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:19,815 And now... 532 00:23:19,940 --> 00:23:21,191 I would like to... 533 00:23:21,317 --> 00:23:23,444 graze again, but this time, 534 00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:26,405 with some intertwining of the tongue. 535 00:23:27,281 --> 00:23:29,867 - We could do that. - Excellent! 536 00:23:34,455 --> 00:23:35,955 Hmm. 537 00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:38,459 Well, now I think we have to take a little break. 538 00:23:38,584 --> 00:23:42,421 With your permission, of course, I would like to take a video 539 00:23:42,546 --> 00:23:44,965 in order to document the evening. 540 00:23:45,090 --> 00:23:48,093 You know, just in case there are any discrepancies 541 00:23:48,218 --> 00:23:51,013 of the he-said, she-said variety. 542 00:23:51,138 --> 00:23:53,057 - Would you be able to forward that to me? - Of course. 543 00:23:53,182 --> 00:23:55,392 I will forward it to you and cc, 544 00:23:55,517 --> 00:23:57,478 or bcc to anyone you like. 545 00:23:57,603 --> 00:23:58,938 Fantastic. 546 00:23:59,063 --> 00:24:01,190 [Larry] Begin session. 547 00:24:02,107 --> 00:24:04,234 - This is Rita. - Hi. 548 00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:06,612 Um, Rita, you're here under your own volition? 549 00:24:06,737 --> 00:24:09,782 {\an8}- I am. Yes. - Nobody forced you here. Isn't that correct? 550 00:24:09,907 --> 00:24:11,492 {\an8}That is correct. Nobody forced me. 551 00:24:11,617 --> 00:24:13,953 {\an8}- You're not here under duress of any kind? - No. 552 00:24:14,078 --> 00:24:16,997 {\an8}- You're kind of enjoying yourself, are you not? - I am. 553 00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:18,916 {\an8}Nothing, uh, untoward has happened. 554 00:24:19,041 --> 00:24:20,667 {\an8}Nothing's happened without your permission. 555 00:24:20,792 --> 00:24:22,503 {\an8}- Absolutely not. - Thus far. 556 00:24:22,628 --> 00:24:24,046 Okay. 557 00:24:24,171 --> 00:24:25,839 - Let's continue. - Let's. 558 00:24:25,965 --> 00:24:29,176 I'm placing my right hand back on her right shoulder, 559 00:24:29,301 --> 00:24:31,929 - with her permission, of course. - Yes. 560 00:24:32,054 --> 00:24:35,975 And now, what I'd like to do is take this left hand, 561 00:24:36,100 --> 00:24:37,810 which I've introduced to you earlier, 562 00:24:37,935 --> 00:24:40,229 I'm going to place it on your inner thigh, 563 00:24:40,354 --> 00:24:43,357 {\an8}and slowly inch my way up, 564 00:24:43,482 --> 00:24:46,484 {\an8}in a crab-like fashion, 565 00:24:46,609 --> 00:24:48,862 Well, seeing as it is our first date, Larry, 566 00:24:48,988 --> 00:24:51,865 I think that I'm going to have to say no to that. 567 00:24:52,491 --> 00:24:54,994 {\an8}- I'm perfectly okay with that. - Okay. 568 00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:57,371 And what if I took this same left hand, 569 00:24:57,496 --> 00:24:59,123 and extended it laterally 570 00:24:59,248 --> 00:25:00,874 {\an8}and somehow wind up 571 00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:02,835 {\an8}on that right breast, 572 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:06,588 {\an8}and perhaps, uh, gave it a little, uh, squeeze. 573 00:25:06,714 --> 00:25:09,717 {\an8}Uh, that would be the worst thing in the world? 574 00:25:10,134 --> 00:25:12,219 {\an8}I'm gonna have to say no again. 575 00:25:12,344 --> 00:25:13,846 Okay. Another no. 576 00:25:13,971 --> 00:25:16,724 {\an8}Hand's away. Look at the hand. All gone. 577 00:25:16,849 --> 00:25:18,267 Well. 578 00:25:19,143 --> 00:25:22,980 - It seems we've reached a bit of an impasse. - I think so. 579 00:25:24,606 --> 00:25:26,859 {\an8}End session. 580 00:25:37,494 --> 00:25:40,122 Well, I'd like to propose a toast 581 00:25:40,247 --> 00:25:41,623 to Andy and Cassie. 582 00:25:41,749 --> 00:25:43,375 - Welcome to the West Coast. - Hear! Hear! 583 00:25:43,500 --> 00:25:45,586 I'm sorry it took us so long to get you here. 584 00:25:45,711 --> 00:25:47,421 - [Susie] But here you are. - [Andy] Thank you so much. 585 00:25:47,546 --> 00:25:49,131 - [Jeff] Yes. - It's a beautiful home. 586 00:25:49,256 --> 00:25:51,215 [Susie] Yeah, well, you know I have a-- -And this is... 587 00:25:51,340 --> 00:25:52,968 This is quite an addition. 588 00:25:53,093 --> 00:25:54,470 Isn't it? Isn't that something? 589 00:25:54,595 --> 00:25:55,888 You know, if I tell you 590 00:25:56,013 --> 00:25:58,015 who got that for me, you're gonna be shocked. 591 00:25:58,140 --> 00:26:00,350 Larry David, the most thoughtful man 592 00:26:00,476 --> 00:26:02,853 I've ever met, had that commissioned. 593 00:26:02,978 --> 00:26:05,064 Where do you find an artist like that? 594 00:26:05,189 --> 00:26:07,357 You'll find it. You look it up. 595 00:26:07,483 --> 00:26:10,152 You know what I love about it is... 596 00:26:10,736 --> 00:26:12,196 - the size. - [Susie] The dimensions. 597 00:26:12,321 --> 00:26:13,781 - Yes. I know. - Oh, the dimensions. 598 00:26:13,906 --> 00:26:15,782 Anything smaller would have felt too small. 599 00:26:15,907 --> 00:26:17,451 Bigger would have felt ostentatious. 600 00:26:17,576 --> 00:26:19,411 [Richard] It's not even that, Susie. 601 00:26:19,536 --> 00:26:21,914 Know what it is? I've never seen you with, I don't know, 602 00:26:22,039 --> 00:26:24,249 with such a joy for life 603 00:26:24,374 --> 00:26:26,085 - in that painting. - [Susie] Yeah, they captured that in me, didn't they? 604 00:26:26,210 --> 00:26:28,045 - [Richard] Absolutely. - [Andy] It's something. 605 00:26:28,170 --> 00:26:29,630 Did you have to send him a picture 606 00:26:29,755 --> 00:26:31,423 and then he painted it from that? 607 00:26:32,132 --> 00:26:33,592 Yeah. 608 00:26:33,717 --> 00:26:35,219 [Cassie] How long does it take once you get the artist-- 609 00:26:35,344 --> 00:26:37,387 I don't know. A couple of weeks. 610 00:26:37,513 --> 00:26:39,348 - Okay? Took a couple of weeks. - [Cassie] Okay. 611 00:26:39,473 --> 00:26:41,850 - Mm. - LD, what the hell's wrong with you? 612 00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:46,522 Three days now. I've gotten the results back from my cancer test. 613 00:26:46,647 --> 00:26:48,898 Not one of you bothered to call me and ask me 614 00:26:49,023 --> 00:26:51,109 if I got the results back. Not one. 615 00:26:51,234 --> 00:26:55,155 And by the way, I did, and I'm fine. Okay? 616 00:26:56,532 --> 00:27:00,494 - Skyler had this paper due for social studies. - It was on Cuba. 617 00:27:00,619 --> 00:27:02,704 We were, we're very immersed in it. 618 00:27:02,830 --> 00:27:04,915 - I'm sorry. You're right. - [Cassie] He's been working with her nonstop. 619 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,667 And I, I, I honestly planned on it, 620 00:27:07,792 --> 00:27:10,254 but I, I, I planned on it. 621 00:27:10,379 --> 00:27:12,256 I ain't gonna lie, man. I fuckin' forgot. 622 00:27:12,381 --> 00:27:15,467 - [Leon] My bad. - I already explained myself. All right? 623 00:27:15,592 --> 00:27:17,386 What kind of friends are you? 624 00:27:17,511 --> 00:27:18,887 Seriously! What kind of friends are you? 625 00:27:19,012 --> 00:27:20,848 - But you're fine, right? - [Larry] Yeah, I'm fine! 626 00:27:20,973 --> 00:27:23,267 {\an8}You know what? You can all go fuck yourself! 627 00:27:23,392 --> 00:27:24,393 [Leon] Oh, shit! 628 00:27:24,518 --> 00:27:26,228 [Richard] Holy Christ! 629 00:27:30,357 --> 00:27:34,153 You ruined my painting! You destroyed it! 630 00:27:35,779 --> 00:27:37,030 Jeff? 631 00:27:37,489 --> 00:27:40,200 What kind of piece of shit, 632 00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:42,494 motherfucker does something like that? 633 00:27:42,619 --> 00:27:44,788 Where the fuck do you get off? 634 00:27:44,913 --> 00:27:46,999 This was the prized possession 635 00:27:47,124 --> 00:27:49,917 - of this household. - I'm so sorry. 636 00:27:50,042 --> 00:27:51,879 - So... You know what? - What? 637 00:27:52,004 --> 00:27:53,630 I'm gonna replace that painting. 638 00:27:53,755 --> 00:27:55,674 I'm gonna give it to the artist, he's gonna fix it, 639 00:27:55,799 --> 00:27:57,301 it's gonna be better than ever. 640 00:27:57,426 --> 00:28:00,220 You don't bring it back until it's perfect. 641 00:28:00,345 --> 00:28:02,055 - Don't worry. I won't. - Wait. Stop, stop! 642 00:28:02,181 --> 00:28:05,017 We were at LACMA, and we met this guy who restores paintings. 643 00:28:05,142 --> 00:28:07,895 - He restores paintings. He's amazing! - No, no, no, no. 644 00:28:08,020 --> 00:28:11,106 Larry, we're gonna help out. Don't you worry. 645 00:28:11,231 --> 00:28:13,942 Hey! Shut the fuck up! I told you I'm gonna do it! 646 00:28:14,067 --> 00:28:15,736 Okay! Okay! 647 00:28:16,945 --> 00:28:18,196 [Susie] God! 648 00:28:18,321 --> 00:28:20,032 [Larry] You know what? 649 00:28:20,157 --> 00:28:23,202 I think this whole thing can be a blessing in disguise. 650 00:28:23,327 --> 00:28:26,371 - Really? - [Jeff] Oh, blessing in disguise? You tell me how. 651 00:28:26,496 --> 00:28:28,999 I've never been entirely happy with this painting. 652 00:28:29,124 --> 00:28:32,294 He didn't really capture the luster of your skin. 653 00:28:32,419 --> 00:28:34,713 Or, or the sparkle in your eyes. 654 00:28:34,838 --> 00:28:36,340 The sparkle in her eyes. 655 00:28:36,465 --> 00:28:37,965 Now I realize it. 656 00:28:38,508 --> 00:28:41,136 A blessing in disguise. 657 00:28:41,261 --> 00:28:43,388 Okay. Thank you. 658 00:28:44,139 --> 00:28:46,099 - [Susie] Let's eat. - Let's eat. 659 00:28:49,061 --> 00:28:50,896 [Milos] So, Larry, we almost finished here. 660 00:28:51,021 --> 00:28:53,482 You got-- You're two-thirds done already. It's incredible. 661 00:28:53,607 --> 00:28:56,360 Plus, I have extra boards for you. 662 00:28:56,485 --> 00:28:58,612 I take it to your house and fix your pantry like new. 663 00:28:58,737 --> 00:29:00,364 - No charge. - What? 664 00:29:00,489 --> 00:29:02,241 - Believe me, I'm gonna pay you. - Larry, I take care of you. 665 00:29:02,366 --> 00:29:04,409 I can take the stuff to your house right now. 666 00:29:06,036 --> 00:29:09,331 Ha. Mrs. Greene. 667 00:29:09,456 --> 00:29:12,501 She make bad recommendation all over town about my business. 668 00:29:12,626 --> 00:29:14,044 - What? - Yes. 669 00:29:14,169 --> 00:29:15,712 - Oh, my God. - Remember? I make mahogany cream? 670 00:29:15,837 --> 00:29:16,922 - Yes. - I work so hard? 671 00:29:17,047 --> 00:29:18,632 - Yes. - I make it nice? 672 00:29:18,757 --> 00:29:20,509 - I know. - And what she do? She ruined my name. 673 00:29:20,634 --> 00:29:23,762 Oh, she's terrible. No friend of the working man. 674 00:29:23,887 --> 00:29:25,514 Okay. Larry, listen, 675 00:29:25,639 --> 00:29:28,558 I can go right now. I take the boards to your house, 676 00:29:28,684 --> 00:29:31,311 - and I make it fast. - Great idea. 677 00:29:43,282 --> 00:29:46,743 ...mahogany cream! 678 00:29:46,868 --> 00:29:51,456 ...mahogany cream! 679 00:29:52,624 --> 00:29:54,668 I mean, the whole thing was just a series 680 00:29:54,793 --> 00:29:56,837 of unfortunate misunderstandings. 681 00:29:56,962 --> 00:29:58,255 That wasn't Harvey Weinstein. 682 00:29:58,380 --> 00:30:00,716 That was Jeff Greene, my manager. 683 00:30:00,841 --> 00:30:03,427 I guess the culture's just sort of changing, and... 684 00:30:03,552 --> 00:30:05,345 - Hmm. Yeah. - ...um, we're 685 00:30:05,470 --> 00:30:08,807 - defining our boundaries more. - Boundaries. Boundaries. Yes. 686 00:30:08,932 --> 00:30:11,435 And personal space, like for instance, my tattoo. 687 00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:13,603 You don't get to demand to know what it's about, 688 00:30:13,729 --> 00:30:15,605 - because it's on my body. - [Larry] No, of course not. Of course not. 689 00:30:15,731 --> 00:30:19,026 I, I'm not that guy. I know who you think-- I'm not that guy. 690 00:30:19,151 --> 00:30:22,195 - Okay. - We don't need lawyers or anything like that. 691 00:30:22,321 --> 00:30:25,324 Come back to work. Bring Bogey. I miss Bogey. 692 00:30:25,449 --> 00:30:27,701 I miss that little doggy. 693 00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:30,537 - [Larry] I'll bring him five bowls, okay? - Okay. 694 00:30:30,662 --> 00:30:32,998 If we can go back with like a mutual respect 695 00:30:33,123 --> 00:30:34,958 and honesty, um... 696 00:30:35,083 --> 00:30:36,668 - [Alice] I really appreciate your openness. - [Ted] That's funny. 697 00:30:36,793 --> 00:30:39,546 You know, this is how culture moves forward. 698 00:30:39,671 --> 00:30:41,840 - Yeah. - What are you doing? 699 00:30:41,965 --> 00:30:44,509 - I'm side-sitting. - You can't side-sit with me. 700 00:30:44,634 --> 00:30:46,636 No, no. Wait. Where are you going? Stay here just one second. 701 00:30:46,762 --> 00:30:48,013 - Oh, my God. - Sit quiet. 702 00:30:48,138 --> 00:30:49,514 - Let go! Oh, my God. - [Ted] Huh. 703 00:30:52,351 --> 00:30:53,852 Hmm? 704 00:30:54,728 --> 00:30:57,272 All right. You're all right. 705 00:30:57,397 --> 00:31:00,734 Let go of me! I came here with an open mind. 706 00:31:00,859 --> 00:31:02,944 - No, no, I-- - You don't get to grab me, 707 00:31:03,070 --> 00:31:05,572 - at a banquette or side-sit! - No, I had to side-sit. 708 00:31:05,697 --> 00:31:07,282 I had to side-sit because... 709 00:31:07,407 --> 00:31:08,867 I had to side-sit because I-- 710 00:31:08,992 --> 00:31:11,203 Aah, what are you-- No, Alice! 711 00:31:13,622 --> 00:31:15,374 Hey, uh... 712 00:31:15,499 --> 00:31:16,750 How'd those test results turn out? 713 00:31:16,875 --> 00:31:18,210 You know, everybody here is really pulling for you. 714 00:31:18,335 --> 00:31:21,171 Oh, they turned out just fine. Thank you very much. 715 00:31:22,005 --> 00:31:23,799 What a blessing. 716 00:31:27,427 --> 00:31:29,971 So Victor and Sammi want to buy a house. What do you think? 717 00:31:30,097 --> 00:31:31,515 We give 'em a down payment. 718 00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,809 Is that too generous? You know, I never know. 719 00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:37,479 Wait a minute, wait a minute. Slow down, slow down, slow down. 720 00:31:37,604 --> 00:31:39,398 What the fuck? 721 00:31:39,523 --> 00:31:43,026 Larry, what the hell did you do to my picture? 722 00:31:43,151 --> 00:31:45,779 Oh, my God! It was beautiful, 723 00:31:45,904 --> 00:31:48,323 and it's all destroyed! 724 00:31:48,448 --> 00:31:50,367 You piece of shit, Larry! 725 00:31:50,492 --> 00:31:54,538 You piece of fucking turd nothing! Fuck you! 726 00:31:54,663 --> 00:31:56,456 Asshole! 727 00:31:56,581 --> 00:31:58,291 [Lucy] Mr. David. 728 00:31:58,417 --> 00:32:01,169 Did you ask Ms. Huff inappropriate questions 729 00:32:01,294 --> 00:32:03,588 about her relationship with her dog, Bogey? 730 00:32:04,005 --> 00:32:06,675 - I guess that all depends on-- - Wait. Objection. Relevance. 731 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:09,302 When she asked you to stop asking questions about her tattoo, 732 00:32:09,428 --> 00:32:11,054 did you respect her wishes? 733 00:32:11,179 --> 00:32:14,182 I was very curious about it. There's a guy with one eye. 734 00:32:14,307 --> 00:32:16,810 I thought it might have been Mr. Clean. 735 00:32:17,853 --> 00:32:19,312 Do you have any idea? 736 00:32:19,855 --> 00:32:22,065 I have no further questions for the witness. 737 00:32:22,190 --> 00:32:23,817 - You may go. - Thank you. 738 00:32:23,942 --> 00:32:26,027 Okay. I actually just have a couple, Lucy. 739 00:32:26,153 --> 00:32:27,446 Mr. David, the answers you're giving today 740 00:32:27,571 --> 00:32:28,989 are your sworn testimony, isn't that right? 741 00:32:29,114 --> 00:32:31,450 - Mm-hmm. - You came here of your own volition, 742 00:32:31,575 --> 00:32:32,909 - voluntarily? - I did. 743 00:32:33,034 --> 00:32:34,327 Because you want the truth to be known. 744 00:32:34,453 --> 00:32:36,872 - Absolutely. - I just have one question. 745 00:32:38,290 --> 00:32:40,083 Did you... 746 00:32:41,168 --> 00:32:43,628 use my bathroom? 747 00:32:44,921 --> 00:32:47,716 - No. - [Roger] I grow tired of asking, Mr. David. 748 00:32:47,841 --> 00:32:49,718 And I remind you, you're under oath. 749 00:32:49,843 --> 00:32:54,514 Did you or did you not use my bathroom?!